If I Was a Workplace Superhero the Stapler Would be my Nemesis

I recently started working at the front desk for a department on my campus. All of it has been amazing, it’s the type of place you think only exists in movies and on TV shows. Everyone is incredibly friendly and welcoming, and that’s really what’s made my first few days so enjoyable.

But today.


Something happened.

I was given the world’s simplest task. In fact, I wasn’t even given this task, it was just something I needed to do as part of a larger task. I needed to staple together two pieces of paper. Simple. Sooo simple.

I surveyed my desk and found the obvious weapon of choice: three staplers. The question was, which stapler would do the job. I looked at the first one, and I’m not gonna lie… I didn’t think I was ready to handle it. It had a button that said “auto,” and that was enough to make me go with one of the simpler staplers. So I made my choice, and immediately regretted it as my handy-dandy stapler had a staple stuck in it and was entirely useless. I messed with that for a few minutes and upon realizing that all my effort was to no avail, I moved on to the second simple stapler. As my luck would have it, that one also had a staple stuck that would not come out for anything in this forsaken world.


(At this point, I’d like for all of us to pretend that my above creation is a work of art and not something that looks like the work of a talented child)

Eventually I had to give up my old-fashioned ways and try my luck with the fancy stapler with buttons. The first button I pushed made an obnoxiously loud sound and the little section that holds staples popped out towards my face. Wrong button. The second one, however, worked! I have no idea how I did it and if asked to do it again I’d probably struggle. But it was a beautiful moment. I had conquered my task, and it had only taken five whole minutes.

Luckily, this is not a quiet work environment, so I hope not too many people witnessed my ridiculous struggle against general office supplies.

(Image created here)


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